I recently read a blog post in which the author expressed her distaste for those who share the details of their adoption story. Her reasoning was that an experience so personal should not be shared in a public place. I can see where she is coming from. And I can respect her desire to keep her story to herself (she is an adoptive mom). It was interesting to read her perspective because it is so different from my own.
I have felt very strongly that some of our story is meant to be told
I feel so grateful that we have been able to share our experiences with adoption. Some of our story is private. There are some details that we are saving for our little guy alone to know. We have been very prayerful about what to share and how and when to share it. The words we have written were written carefully. We asked permission from our sweet birthmomma to include her in our story. I don’t know how to tell it without speaking of her. After all, if it weren’t for our Natalie, we wouldn’t have an adoption story to begin with!
You see, our lives have been so immeasurably blessed by the miracle of adoption! How could we possibly keep quiet? It seems ungrateful to do so. What if there are other individuals whose lives could be similarly blessed? Besides, I like to think that we can be a force for good in sharing how adoption can be an amazing, positive, experience. There is plenty of inaccurate/negative information out there. Maybe our story can help refute some of those damaging misconceptions about adoption.
But maybe even more than that, our son’s birth was a cause for celebration! I wouldn’t want to keep the way in which he joined our family a secret from him or anyone else. He came to us in the way he came to us for a reason. His little life had meaning and purpose before long before he was ours. And I want him to be proud of his story someday.
I love to share how we feel about open adoption. I know that openness isn’t a possibility for everyone, but I am so glad that it works for us. I share a lot about why we have an open relationship with our baby’s birthmomma because it is a big part of our lives. It is important to us.
And sharing our story has given our family some special opportunities. We have made friends who also have connections with adoption. These individuals have been an awesome support. We have gotten a few nice comments or e-mails from people telling us that they were touched by some part of our story. Those kind words make all the effort it takes to write it all out worth it.
Although I know I have no say in how much you share. I have loved reading your story and have totally changed my mind about open adoptions since reading your and Natalie's story. While I don't know or need to know why you became Masons parents I have really enjoyed reading your story and your thoughts about adoption. It has helped me to be far more open minded about every situation. Thank you so much for sharing your story and for being so open and generous with your time.
ReplyDeleteI love hearing your family's story! It is such a beautiful story full of so many miracles. It reminds me that God has a hand in our lives and in our families:) Love you!!
ReplyDeleteI love that you share your story. I love soaking in every last word and picture. I love the hope that radiates through all of it. I love the peace and love that shines so brightly in your story. Your story gives me, and I'm sure many others, such hope. Love you!
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way and I, too, make sure our son's birth mom is okay with posting things about her!
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way. I have heard people say, "It's their story - and so it is up to them to share it." And I think, "But it's my story too!" So I try to find a respectful medium. If it weren't for other people sharing their stories - especially about open adoption - I don't know that I would have pursued it.
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