To Our Dear Birthmom:

Our prayers have changed.  It is not a bad thing; it’s just an observation. 

When we first started hoping for our family to grow, we would pray that Heavenly Father would help us get pregnant.  Month after month we would hope and pray and hope and pray some more.  

Nothing happened, so we prayed to find a good doctor.  We did.  We found a wonderful doctor.  We began fertility treatments.  With every procedure we would pray, “Please oh please let it work this time.”  We always prayed, “thy will be done” but always hoped that this time, maybe, our little baby would come. 

Then we began to wonder… “What if we are praying to get pregnant, but that is not Heavenly Father’s will for us?  What if we are meant to find our baby through adoption?”  So we began to pray, “Please help us find our baby, in the way they were meant to come to us.” 

But our prayers changed again.  We still pray to find our baby, but we pray more fervently than ever, “Please bless our birthmom.  Bless her to know how much we love her.  Bless her to be healthy.  Bless her to be happy.  Bless her to know how much she means to us, even though we haven’t met her yet.  Bless her to find us.”  Because really, if we are to find our baby, our birthmom must first find us. 

It is amazing how we can love someone so much, even though we haven’t ever met.  But we do.  If I were able to tell our birthmom one thing, I would tell her how much I love her.  I would tell her how brave she is.  I would tell her that her selfless sacrifice means more than words could ever possibly express.  How could you ever begin to thank someone for making your family complete?  The task is impossible, and yet I long to try.  I want her to know that I am her biggest fan.  I am her greatest advocate.  I want the best for her not just because of what she will do for her baby, but for who she is.  Because it takes someone incredibly, indescribably  special to sacrifice so much so that her baby can have the life they were meant to have.  It takes courage, faith, maturity, selflessness, hope, tears, and love to place her child in an eternal family. 

Our dear Birthmom, if you could only see yourself as we see you, and as your Heavenly Father sees you!  I hope you do.  I hope you recognize what a beautiful gift you are giving your child.  I hope you realize just how much you are valued and loved.  I hope you see your own goodness. 

We think about you all of the time.  We wonder what we can do to reach out to you.  We hope we are doing our part so that you can find us.  We pray to know what more we can do to let you feel our love for you.  When I say that you are always on our mind, I mean it literally.  We pray for you with every prayer we say and we think of you even more often than that.  We sometimes feel powerless to reach you.  However, if I know ANYTHING I KNOW that Heavenly Father hears and answers prayers.  I know He is watching over you.  I know he will help you find us.   

We can’t wait to meet you.  To tell you these things in person.  Until that day we will continue to pray, “Please oh please bless our birthmom.”